Do you ever hear yourself saying, 'That's not like me to do that', or 'Part of me wants to do (fill in the blank), but part of me wants to do (the opposite)?' Do you make a bold change in your life, only later to hear your inner critic, or gremlin, or vulnerable self wince and second guess all of those bold new actions or statements?
That is because we ALL comprise a multitude of "parts" or selves, often carrying conflicting and even opposing feelings, desires, wants, needs, and concerns. Voice Dialogue allows us to experience the impact of our many "selves" on our lives and transform the energy drain between differing selves into an energy surge as these selves are given voice and acknowledgment. Voice Dialogue is a powerful tool for conscious thoughtful action. It allows us to stand between our various opposing selves, and change our habitual "either/or" thinking into acceptance of our wholeness. It provides an exciting path to shift from automatic reactive patterns to full aliveness in the present.
We are like the Chairperson of a corporation-the corporation in this instance is us. I'll speak of myself, and say that I am the Chairwoman of the Corporation called 'BJ Levy'. On my "board of directors" are my various parts or selves. Some of the Board 'members' are 'responsible self', 'playful self', 'partner', 'independence', 'loner', 'connector', 'comptroller', 'shopper', 'teacher', 'student'---I could go on as I, like everyone, have infinite parts. Just as you wouldn't want the comptroller of the corporation planning the company Christmas party, you don't want your 'responsible' self being in charge of your vacation, or your "loner" part running your relationship with your children and your spouse.
Awareness and dialogue with our parts, being able to see them as facets of us, being able to appreciate and embrace all of the aspects of ourselves, but not be run by them, is the goal of Voice Dialogue. As we learn to identify, hear from, and separate from these facets, know their strengths and weaknesses, acknowledge what they bring to the table of our lives, we are able to 'grow' the Chairperson part of ourselves, what in Voice Dialogue is called 'the Aware Ego.'
From the place of Aware Ego or Center, we are able to respond in the moment and make conscious creative choices that are not available to us when we are living from individual facets. Instead of having the button of a 'self' pushed to come out even if that self is not the most useful in the moment, we learn to choose the self or selves that best serve us.
Merging Voice Dialogue with Coaching provides an enhanced path of conscious, grounded transformation. Voice Dialogue Coaching is especially valuable when a client is stuck and/or feeling disempowered. The coaching team can look at which 'self' has been coming to the coaching call and making agreements and which 'selves' have blocked follow through after the coaching session because they were not consulted. By integrating Voice Dialogue with Coaching, the client is given the opportunity to hear the voices, programming, motivation, fears and wishes of opposite parts, and 'separate' from them. From a growing Center and embracing all 'selves', the client experiences new perspectives and is empowered to make and follow through with creative choices, expanding their world of possibility.